Two Cycles, One Household: Perimenopause Meets Puberty

By: Dr. Beverly Huang, ND, MSCP

There are moments in motherhood no one prepares you for. Like the day you realize your body is beginning its own transition—just as your daughter is stepping into hers.

Perimenopause and puberty under the same roof.

At first, I laughed at the irony. Then, I realized how deeply layered this stage really is—for both of us.

Hormones in Stereo

My daughter’s hormones are just starting to surge, shaping her brain, body, and sense of self.
Meanwhile, mine are beginning their rollercoaster descent—sometimes surging, sometimes crashing—leaving me with anxiety, night sweats, brain fog, and emotions that feel raw.

It’s like we’re both sitting in the same hormonal orchestra, but playing completely different instruments. Like completely different songs! 

The Mirror Effect

Watching her reminds me of myself at that age—the insecurity, the curiosity, the intensity. And sometimes, when she’s filling with emotions, I can feel my own irritability spike right alongside hers.

It’s a hormonal hall of mirrors: her estrogen climbing, mine dipping; her cycles just beginning, mine growing more unpredictable.

But instead of clashing, I try to remind myself—this is our chance to model something different.

Breaking the Silence

When I was her age, no one talked about periods or puberty beyond the basics. And no one mentioned menopause ... EVER! Silence was the norm.

But not in my house.
I tell her what’s happening in my body and what's happening in hers. We talk about cramps, moods, cravings, and how our brains feel different on certain days.

I want her to see that hormones aren’t something to be ashamed of or brushed under the rug. They’re powerful, they shape us, and we deserve to understand them. "Periods"  and "hormones" are not evil words in our home. I have really done what I can to normalize this conversation. 

What I Hope She Learns

My greatest wish is that she learns, from watching me, that her health and her voice matter. That when her body changes—whether at 13, 43, or 63—she has the right to understand it and to ask for support.

Because the truth is, women’s health has been dismissed for too long. Puberty and menopause may be opposites in biology, but they share the same cultural silence.

And in this home, we’re breaking that cycle.

Being a mom in perimenopause while raising a daughter in puberty is messy, loud, and emotional—but also beautiful. We’re growing together, side by side, both learning what it means to inhabit a changing body.

Two generations, two transitions. One conversation.